My First Love... Oh How I Miss Thee.

My first love gave me so much joy. I would eat, sleep, and live by it. It is what I looked forward to when I woke up in the morning, and what I dreamt about when I went to sleep at night. I was in love for years, and with each passing year, my passion grew stronger and stronger. I felt like I belonged and it belonged to me, the one thing that no one could ever take away from me will be my love forever... or so I thought. It wasn't until the day that I fell out of love with Basketball is the day my passion for life fell out along with it. 

Basketball to me made me feel free. It was a stress release, and so much fun. I've never had more fun in my life than the time when basketball was my first love. My favorite part of playing was when my adrenaline would be pumping at the start of the game, as the ball is thrown in the air to see which team will have the first points scored. And also, towards the end of the game when every single move was accounted for in order not to foul or foul out because we wanted to be the team to take it home always. Well, the best part, actually, was during the game where I'd get to run and be free in my element of the game. The happiness that game brought to me is describable and quite sad because I've never felt this way about anything else before in my life.

I miss that feeling of wanting something so bad that you will do anything to attain it. I miss the fun that use to come with it. I miss being so passionate about something that just the thought of it not being in your life anymore didn't even exist. That's how I felt when I was playing basketball. It was something that was so apart of me that I thought that it would never leave. When it was swiped from me right in front of my very eyes, I turned my back on it and never ever looked back. Until now.

I want that feeling back. That feeling of living and breathing  something that you truly believe in. That feeling that being in love with something so much that it brings out the passion in you. I want the fire in my eyes again. Now if only I can find where I put it.

The Cross Roads...

You ever find your self at a cross roads, and don't know where to turn? I mean literally, you have no idea which way to move. You can go left, right, back, or forward. The obvious move would be to move forward, you can not argue with that. But how do you know if it is the right move?

I am at a crossroads, and I am not sure how proceed. I've been going around and around in circles for quite some time now, and I am getting very dizzy, sick and tired. I always wanted to move forward, but wasn't sure if that is the correct thing to do at this point. I've been hibernating and waiting for so long, it was not certain to me which steps I should take.

It kind of came to me in a dream. There was army of men marching, it was raining, snowing, sunny, night, morning, clear skies, lightning, thunder, etc... all of the natural wonders that this world brings to us by the weather. The men just kept marching, one after another. There was a point in time in the dream where one man fell down, the man that was just immediately behind him, scooped him up, and the march continued without even skipping a beat. That dream gave me my answer. ONWARD...MARCH!!!!

Where's All The New Year Spirit...

Is it just me or has the spirit of the New Year just came and left this year, already? 2011 seems like a miraculous year to be apart of, I don't know what it is but it seems many good things are to come out of this year. But the people aren't showing their gratitude about being able to make it to this year of 2011. The universal energies of the New Year, new things have not made its way to most of us. We don't have any new year resolutions, we are already upset or mad about something in this early stage of 2011, and some people are up to the same old ish as if there isn't a universal thought that is sending messages through our energy that it's time to start anew.

There's something strange going on in the minds of our fellow human beings and I am curious to find out. Could it be that our inner thoughts are sending subliminal messages that we are heading to doom (2012) so there is nothing to look forward to? Or are we so washed up with the out with the old, in with the new factor that it seems that there is no use in even trying? Whatever the case is, it seems like a lot of people have given up on New Year bliss.

Truth be told, anyone knows that you do not need a new year to start fresh. We are given free will, which means free speaking and doing so we can start over, or something new at any time that we choose. It is just that the new year allows those that do not have the strength or the will to have hope of starting again. But with this universal anti new year thing that is going on, it makes it easier for the slackers to stay at a slackers state of mind, and for those that are uncertain to stay in stuck in their thoughts.

I am a person that feels many energies; bad vibes, good vibes, creepy vibes etc... and the vibe that I felt last year of people welcoming in 2010 was much greater than the vibe of welcoming in 2011. I know I am not the only one who noticed this; look around, people are off their New Year high horse and back in that struggling state of mind.

Even though there are no New Year resolutions coming from my way, I see the bigger picture, and I like what I see. I'm gonna be on my NYB (New Year Bliss) and make the best of what is to come. I advise you all to do the same. As we know tomorrow isn't promised, we were chosen to make it to this wonderful year of 2011 for a reason, it's a blessing. Treat it as so.

A Little Astrology, Anyone??

Ok, I'm going to admit, I dabble in the occasional Horoscope and Psychic tendencies. It's a total guilty pleasure of mine that came out of no where when I was a child. I was always into the Zodiac and what each sign meant. I have been studying Zodiac Signs since high school. There is so much that goes into Astrology that it can make your mind go bonkers, but most people just concentrate on the Sun Signs which is the most Popular of Astrology.

Please look below to find your Sun Sign and what 2011 might mean to you:

Capricorn: This year is all about you. In the past your family, friends, co-workers, etc... may have come first in your life, but 2011 is all about exploring your inner self and what will truly make you happy in this life. Yes you will feel guilty at first because it seems like you are being selfish, but this selfishness to find yourself is something that is needed in order to move to the next step in life.

Aquarius: Last year was all about you and a little self recognition. It is hard for you to be the actual person that you want to be because all your life you have been wondering, Who am I? Why am I here? What is this life of mine? This year, you will find it. Whether it is a huge break up, big move, new job, or a new way of thinking, your life fulfillment will come in full throttle this year. Be ready, willing, and accepting.

Pisces: You emotional roller coaster you!! Lucky for you, the ride will come to an end this year, or at least make a pit stop somewhere in between freedom and a new way of thinking. The only thing to remember Pisces, is that you are the only one to stop the turmoil in your life, or create the beauty that is around you. This year of 2011 is at your finger tips. You will create your own destiny to greatness, or your road to demise. Please choose wisely.

Aries: The trials and tribulations that you faced though out the years have made you hard. You are fun loving, happy, a go getter, determined... and not the least bit modest about it. Trouble is, your lack of modesty is fake because you need to build more self confidence this year. You have the will for sure, and you definitely have the way. Don't worry about the competition because you got it in the bag!! Worry about your true value of self.

Taurus: The Bull. Truth be told, you haven't been bulling around much in 2010. Everything has been pretty much easy going for you, meaning, you fall of the horse, no worries, you ain't hurt, you get right back on and pick up where you left off. This doesn't mean that 2011 will be a walk in the park, there will always be issues, it just depends on how you react and handle them. Taurus, 2011 is about finding the fun in you... again. Remember when you were a kid and the endless imagination just poured in? Pretend your a kid, you need that excitement back.

Gemini: When is your life not a complicated issue? Always down for whatever, there to lend a helping hand, and down for the cause, you and your twin really create magic in your world. Yes, magic is in your world, it does exist. My advise to you is to find someone that you are really interested in, whether it be a mate, a friend, a co-worker, or someone you met randomly on the street because we know you are good for that. Learn about this person, be intrigued by them. You will find your magic.

Cancer: 2010 was fulfilling to you. You feel accomplished, like you got something done. Maybe you have loved then lost, deleted a couple of people out of your life, moved on when others thought you weren't. 2011 is a continuation of your new found interests/feelings. You are a crab, you get bored easily... and heated as easily as well. Try to find the balance in all things. It might not be what you wished for or what you wanted, but balance in your life is key. Without balance Crab, you will fail.

Leo: 2010... Wow, where should I begin. Either 2010 was a ho-hum of a year or a whirlwind of a year. I'm pretty sure you know which spectrum you are on. Either way, you are ready for changes. Changes away from the Old and towards the New. You are ready!! But Leo, are you willing? Are you willing to take the steps necessary to create the big changes that you so desperately need? My advice to you is to not think about what others say to you or about you. They are not the ones creating your life, unless you let them. Take charge of your dreams and run for the gold. In this case Leo, your words need to be silenced, and your confidence needs to speak. I know it sounds easy, but I'm afraid Leo, for you, this will be a challenge of a lifetime. Good Luck!!

Virgo: The hard work in everything that you do proves that you like achieving things. Some people will never be as determined as you, or hard working, or as loving and caring. But, we are all people and are on a different path in this life. 2011 is about forgiving and forgetting, letting loose, and a more human understanding of people. If you can attain this in 2011, I guarantee the perfectionist issues that you have within yourself will simmer you to a more human way of thinking, living, and being.

Libra: La Libra. My, how you have grown in 2010!! Isn't it grand. It's like a whole new you. Don't you love it? Don't you want to keep it? There is still so much more to learn, so many more ways to be, but I assure you Libra, you are on your way. As long as something doesn't take you off your focus of this new way of being, the possibilities are endless. For 2011, be aware of those people around you, your so called frienemies. They are the only ones that can push you off track and will leave you to pick up your own pieces. Those frienemies include real friends, family, co-workers, or even someone you haven't even met yet! Beware, your mission is far more important to be tampered with.

Scorpio: You are loving life right now. That still doesn't mean you don't have your own demons to face. As good of luck this life has given you, it is only fitting that you face your fears. They will haunt you until the end of time. Whatever it is that you need to get off your chest, please do!! It's good for the head, it's good for the heart, and good for the soul. Life is a big huge school of lessons, don't be afraid to learn one. Besides that, luck will always be on your side so go with it.

Sagittarius: Things were pretty stale in 2010. Not as exciting as the other years. No love lost, No love found. That isn't the typical way of the Sag. You are the highlight of all the zodiac, so why in the year of 2010 were other signs out shining you? Not to say that in 2010 there weren't any ups; there were plenty... a lot of downs too. Truth is Sag, you are so stuck in this way of being that it is hard to pull you out of it. My advise to you is to remember the Old you, this new you is not doing the trick. Remember your drive for life and living and the things that make you happy. You forgot didn't you? Loose those that are stale in your life, be open to those that are here in your life for greater good of you. Follow my direction and my Sagittarius, you will find YOU again.